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2019 ZCF XI

Posted: Tue Dec 31, 2019 11:54 pm
by eugene
It is time for the ZCF XI of 2019. In keeping with reality the squad has been named at the last minute with little rhyme or reason. With so little cricket being played it is a miracle a team has even been named.

Previous years lineups can be found at the following links:

2018: http://www.zimcricketforums.com/viewtop ... 018+zcf+xi
2017: viewtopic.php?t=14398
2016: viewtopic.php?t=12822
2015: viewtopic.php?t=11838
2014: viewtopic.php?t=6934
2013: viewtopic.php?t=6499
2012: viewtopic.php?t=5336



2019 ZCF XI
1. encore: Back for more punishment, encore stormed back into contention for an opening spot with a 28-ball duck in his backyard cricket league which is at least equal to a century or two in county cricket.
2. Black Mamba: Selected as an opener as he might be black, or at least has black in his name.
3. CrimsonAvenger: CrimsonAvenger remains the leading run scorer on the team and displays the level of insanity necessary to support the ZCF XI. After eight years of losing he remains convinced that a maiden victory is just around the corner.
4. jaybro: With neither TapsC or conant in the team jaybro has taken up batting again as he has no one to bowl (aim) at in the nets. Given the ZCF tail starts at 4 there isn't much pressure on him to score big.
5. Zimfan1 / ZIMFAN: Are these guys the same player? They possess all the same strokes so perhaps it doesn't matter which one is selected?
6. brmtaylor.com: Does little of anything these days, only in the team due to having friends in high places.
7. ZIMDOGGY: Despite rumours of a defection to the lucrative Estonian T20 Blitz, ZIMDOGGY has decided to stick it out with ZCF after he found a way to make money providing Kriterion_BD with pitch reports and team selections. On an unrelated note, ZIMDOGGY has developed a penchant of giving his wicket away inexplicably.
8. Mueddie28: As predicted, Mueddie has ascended to the captaincy. His fielding placements are rather unorthodox, with googly perenially finding himself at leg slip, even in the final overs of a T20.
9. zimbos_05: A newcomer to the side who has quietly accumulated wickets without anyone noticing. Has anyone else ever heard of this guy?
10. Googly: Continues to link ZCFs talented youngsters with Kolpak contracts in the UK as ZCF is sure to die by the end of the week. Every game he plays he announces his retirement due to this impending demise, only to unretire the following week when somehow another game is arranged.
11. Jemisi: A career year for the express bowler who is now flourishing and full of confidence without the dastardly maehara wielding his selection axe. ZCF admin are the best!


Coach: sloandog: Spends most his time in the phpBB bar at the ZCF Sports Ground. Having never won a match as coach it is no wonder he has been reduced to a shiftless drunk. Long gone are the glory days of him steaming in from the maehara end.

Selector: eugene: Aloof and disinterested, eugene makes the perfect selector for ZCF as anyone with any passion for the game would not go near this organisation.

Doctor: Dr_Situ (ZimFanatic): Questions remain over his credentials, but he has doctor in his name so that makes him more than qualified in the eyes of ZCF admin.

Administrators: Conant / TapsC: This masterful duo has been forced on ZCF by the ICC who feared a more competent leadership team might threaten the dominance of India. The glory days of tawac and anusha_gamage are a thing of the past.

Player Representative: jimmylesaint: Rumours of jimmylesaint's demise turned out to be exaggerated. Rarely seen without his tinfoil helmet as he fears ZCF admin are reading his thoughts.


Changes from 2018:
The Robot: Short circuited after trying to play a shot other than the reverse sweep. Considered the next batsmen of the rank if one of the regulars fails.
foreignfield: Ditched ZCF for the Bavarian Cricketoberfest Boozers T10 League.

Re: 2019 ZCF XI

Posted: Wed Jan 01, 2020 2:33 am
by CrimsonAvenger
Hilarious as usual eugune!

Particularly liked the bits on ZIMDOGGY, Googly, the coach (maehara end, phpBB bar, etc. :D), the admins and the new skipper.

I was also on the verge of defecting by the way, as posts dried out this year. Conant offered me the Director of ZCF post if I retired voluntarily. But I took strong objection. I scared him off saying I'd be coming out with a tell-all autobiography soon. However, on the sidelines, I have paid a certain Mankunzini guy to fix me up in the Bavarian Cricketoberfest Boozers T10 League that even foreignfield is playing in. Mankunzini has promised me 1500 Euros per match and he even met Angela Merkel in this regard and shared a selfie with her last week. Hoping for some good news soon from the ever reliable Mankunzini.

Re: 2019 ZCF XI

Posted: Wed Jan 01, 2020 3:18 am
by Jemisi
Happy New Year and thanks Eugene.

Nice to have some things intact.

I will try and work on my batting having slipped to No.11. Must try and hit the nets but I must confess I have been up at KFC a fair bit lately.

Re: 2019 ZCF XI

Posted: Wed Jan 01, 2020 11:52 pm
by jaybro
Well done again Eugene and thanks again for the selection, probably more fitting for myself to play as a batsman rather than a pace bowler considering my height or lack there of 😂

It was a hard year to produce any content for Zimbabwe cricket but looking at the fixtures for next year we should have a big year with plenty of cricket to chat about in 2020

Re: 2019 ZCF XI

Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2020 1:25 am
by sloandog
Fantastic

Re: 2019 ZCF XI

Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2020 1:50 am
by zimbos_05
YES!!! FINALLY!!! All that hard work has paid off.

Re: 2019 ZCF XI

Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2020 7:46 pm
by foreignfield
Nice one, hilarious as usual, Eugene, although I have to make one correction: It's not all T10 for me these days, as CrimsonAvenger can testify who joined up with me for a glorious ODI a few weeks ago :D

I promise to be back more regularly if the ZCF XI returns to more glamorous hunting grounds than the 'international stadia' we've seen recently on mute youtube feeds where the atmosphere reminds me too much of the sad excuse for a cricket ground my home town has to offer.